We are really living in our minds . . . where we’re not really connected to the world around us, nor centered in our own body or being
The holiday season is stressful. We often worry about things that might happen, ruminate about what happened in holidays past, and see others as judging us.
We do this through the lens we use to judge ourselves, which is often filtered through our toxic girly thoughts—how we internalize societal values of beauty and accomplishment—and we use these negative thoughts to essentially torment ourselves. Yes, our thoughts do distort our connection to our world and to ourselves.
Projecting Our Worst Fears
Ask yourself if you’ve ever worried about things like:
- your cookies not being as good as the year before;
- your in-laws still talking about your husband’s ex, who was so loving;
- the weight you gained last holiday season, which you are still walking around with; or
- how you will measure up to the other women at the holiday and family gatherings.
These are all examples of toxic girly thoughts, ideas that deprive you of feeling gratitude for what you do have by focusing you away from the present, away from your personal strengths and resilience.
Counteract Those Toxic Girly Thoughts!
Instead of focusing on your fears, try turning those negative messages around and focus on your gratitude.
Connecting with your spirit’ your essence—and not your toxic girly thoughts allows you to feel grateful. So instead of:
- Worrying about how your cookies will be judged, enjoy that you still want to put in all the work to make them. Be grateful for the gift of your loving spirit that creates these gifts of love.
- Remembering all the horrible things your in-laws have said about you, listen for the positive things and appreciate them for these thoughts, even if they are few. Be grateful for how they can love, even if it is more limited than you and your husband would like.
- Feeling fat from last years’ holiday season, let your weight make you grateful that you are able to make different decisions about your food this holiday season. Embrace your spirit of change.
- Worrying about other women at parties—just be your dazzling self. Yes, free your spirit to enjoy yourself instead of judging yourself. You’ll be, and will be seen, as much more attractive by embracing who you are.
Feeling grateful yet? Good, remember not listening to your toxic ‘girly thoughts’ is a gift you can give yourself this holiday season, and all 2016.
Remember, you’ll find more ideas for getting rid of your negative self-talk in my latest book, The Girly Thoughts 10-Day Detox Plan: The Resilient Woman’s Guide to Saying NO to Negative Self-Talk and YES to Personal Power